Okay, well, as a few of you may already know, we have been trying to have another baby for about a year now. We wanted to start trying early since it took us over 2 years to get pregnant with Bry.
With Kayston we got pregnant the very first month we tried. It's just so weird how things work, isn't it?!
For any of you who have had troubles getting pregnant, you know how I feel. And for those of you who haven't...you're lucky!! A part of me feels bad for even writing about this because I have so many friends that can't even get pregnant with one. I know that some people think that I should just be grateful for the 2 kids that I have, and believe me I AM but, it doesn't mean that it still doesn't hurt that we're having trouble having another one. Especially since I know that there is at least one more baby out there for us.
I have always wanted my kids to be close in age and for some reason, it's just not working out that way. I know that there is a bigger plan that I can't control, but I wish I could in this situation.
I've been to the doctor and had a few tests done, everything looked fine so now I have to go in this week to have an HSG test done. I had to do this before and it is NOT fun! (it's where they inject dye in your tubes to make sure there is no blockage)
Not only is it painful, but it's expensive and we have the suckiest insurance out there I swear.
The worst part is, is that I'm pretty sure nothing will be wrong so we will have done it for nothing. I mean, I guess it's good that nothing is wrong but I sometimes wish that there would be something wrong so we could get it fixed...problem solved.
It's especially hard when I see irresponsible people out there having babies that they didn't want in the first place. I'm not the kind of person that gets bitter or jealous at someone who is pregnant when I'm not, but come on people, be smart! (Has anybody watched 16 and pregnant on MTV??)
That is one of my biggest questions in life. Why is it, that the people who would make the best parents, can't have kids and then 14 year old drug addicts get pregnant the first time they have sex? WHY???
I'm pretty sure that this is what's causing my stress and being "short fused". It's really stressful, not only because we want another baby REALLY bad or that I turned 30 recently and now I'm feeling old and my original plan was to be done having kids by the time I was 30, but we're also paying for supplemental maternity insurance. The longer it takes to get knocked up...the less money we get. =) Plus it just sucks paying for it every month when we're not sure whats going to happen.
Okay, I feel better now! Thanks for listening, and don't worry, I won't ask for any tips or advice on how to get pregnant!! =)
5 comments:
I'm so sorry you have been having a hard time getting pregnant. We never had that 3rd baby either. When Garrett turned 8 I knew I didn't want that kind of space between kids. It was hard to come to that reality though. You are still so young and you have plenty of time! I'm sure you are having fun trying :)
I've seen that 16 and pregnant show...what a joke, those girls have no idea what they are doing...it makes me feel so bad for the babies. Last weeks was nice that she actually made the right decision and gave the baby to someone that deserved it.
I will be praying for you and hope that a stork will be delivering a package soon! If he drops it off at my house I will make sure they know it's the wrong house! haha
I'm so sorry your having to go through this AGAIN! I totally know how you feel, it was really hard for me to look at my brother who was one of those still in high school knock up his girlfriend and has now once again done it again! We planned to start trying again when Parker was a year and I've even been hesitant because I don't know if I'm ready to deal with what might be very stressful AGAIN! I saw a girl on Dr. Phil who was obsessed with getting pregnant and I know they were all laughing at her, but truly you really feel that way sometimes. Don't you ever feel like why even make a plan because it never seems to work out that way. I am truly sorry your going through this and I don't think you are ungrateful at all, there's always someone out there struggling with something harder but it doesn't take away how your feeling. I really hope thinks work out soon, and your not old so don't feel that way!
This is all to familiar with me, but in my case, it was a good thing, because I GOT YOU!!!
I'll pray harder...
I like your new blog Keri! I'll keep you in my prayers. Everyone has different challenges, and I can definitely relate to the fact that life is hard. I hope you get pregnant soon, your fuse gets longer, and you find the courage to share you testimony. Thanks for sharing some of your trials - it's nice to know what others are going through!
I think everything is going to work out just fine for you guys and I can't wait when that time comes. Sometimes when I get a text from you I hope it's news. :)
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